How to Get the Most Out of Therapy: Tips From a Clinical Psychologist

Insights from Lara Malobrodski, Clinical Psychologist

Starting therapy is a big step, and it's natural to wonder how to actually make it count. Therapy works best when you're an active part of it, and small shifts in how you show up can make a real difference to what you take away.

Here are five tips from a clinical psychologist for getting the most out of therapy, whether you're just starting out or a few sessions in.

How to get the most out of therapy · MD

How to Get the Most Out of Therapy: 5 Tips From a Clinical Psychologist

Insights from Lara Malobrodski, Clinical Psychologist

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Starting therapy is a big step, and it's natural to wonder how to actually make it count. The truth is that therapy isn't something that's simply done to you. It works best when you're an active part of it, and small shifts in how you show up can make a real difference to what you take away.

Here are five tips from a clinical psychologist for getting the most out of therapy, whether you're just starting out or a few sessions in.

1. Bring whatever's actually on your mind

It's tempting to arrive at a session with a neat, prepared topic, something that feels serious enough to count as "real" therapy material. But the tidy version isn't always the useful one.

Often it's the small, mundane thing you almost didn't mention, the offhand comment, the minor irritation, the "this is probably nothing, but..." that turns out to be the most revealing. Those throwaway moments are where your patterns quietly show up.

So try not to curate. If something is on your mind, it's worth bringing, even if you can't explain why it matters. Working out why it matters is part of the job you and your psychologist do together.

2. Be willing to sit with discomfort

Some of the most valuable moments in therapy are also the most uncomfortable. When a topic makes you want to change the subject, crack a joke, or move on quickly, that discomfort is often a signal that you're close to something worth looking at.

That doesn't mean forcing yourself to relive everything at once. You're allowed to go at your own pace, and you can set that pace together with your psychologist. But when you notice the urge to skate over something, it can help to name it out loud instead. Even "this feels hard to talk about" is a doorway into meaningful work.

3. Treat the time between sessions as part of the work

An hour a week is a small slice of your life. The real change tends to happen in the other one hundred and sixty-seven hours, out in your actual day-to-day.

So think of the time between sessions as part of the process, not a pause in it. Reflect on what came up, notice when a pattern you talked about shows up in real life, and try out anything you and your psychologist discussed. You might jot down a few thoughts as the week goes on, so you're not starting from scratch next time.

This is where insight starts to turn into change.

4. Challenge your psychologist, and be open to being challenged

If something your psychologist says doesn't sit right with you, say so. That feedback isn't rude or unhelpful, it's genuinely useful, and it helps them tailor the work to you.

A skilled psychologist will welcome that kind of honesty, and will often gently challenge you in return. Being open to that, sitting with a question that unsettles you a little, or considering a perspective you hadn't thought of, is where a lot of growth happens. The best sessions tend to go both ways.

5. Show up, even on the weeks you'd rather not

There will be weeks when you're tired, busy, or just not in the mood, and cancelling feels like the easy option. It's worth paying attention to that pull, because the sessions you least feel like attending are often the ones that matter most.

Sometimes the urge to skip is a sign that something tender is coming up, and avoidance is doing its usual quiet work. That's not a hard rule, and there are genuine weeks when a break makes sense. But if you notice yourself wanting to pull out, it's worth being curious about why, and even raising it with your psychologist rather than simply cancelling. Consistency is part of what makes therapy work.

Key takeaways

• Bring whatever's genuinely on your mind, not just the topics that feel "serious enough." The small stuff is often the most revealing.
• Discomfort is usually a signal you're near something important, not a reason to change the subject. Go at a pace that works for you.
• Treat the time between sessions as part of the work. Reflect, notice, and practise what you discussed.
• Give your psychologist honest feedback, and stay open to being gently challenged in return.
• Show up even on the weeks you'd rather not. The sessions you want to skip are often the ones that matter most.

When you're ready to find your match

Getting the most out of therapy starts with having the right person to do it with. When you're ready, Pair can match you with an AHPRA-verified psychologist who fits what you're looking for. It's free to get started.